It's the little things, really...
Chase: Oh, Baby, don’t be a C word.
Me: Did you just call me the C word?!
Chase: No, I said to don’t be one so that I don’t have to think, ‘Oh, what a cunt!’.
Me: (Gasp) You little! You know that cunt you like so much?
Me: Well, you’re not getting any anymore!
Chase: Why, did you talk to her?
All day long, my boyfriend has been answering every question with something to do with Skyrim. He is so excited for the release of this game that he literally cannot think of anything else and considers it the most important thing ever. Don’t get me wrong. I get it and everything but JESUS. Conversations with him have been trying, at best.
Me: I can’t even talk to you about anything because you don’t respond to anything I’ve said with anything relating to the subject I’m trying to discuss!
Chase: But, Skyrim!
Me: Skyrim, Skyrim, Skyrim, Skyrim. Skyrim, Skyrim? Um, Skyrim. Skyrim! Skyrim. That’s what you sound like!
Chase: That was really hot.
This is exactly what the world looks like through his eyes right now. He’s been crouching in corners, wielding an invisible sword explaining that he has just “toggled sneak”. That he is “in stealth mode”. Yes, dear reader. He has been playing Skyrim in the real world. I’m assuming I am the giant grizzly. Sigh.
tumblrbot asked: WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE INANIMATE OBJECT?
We left the Jack-In-The-Box drive tru and he commented on the girl who’d served us…
Chase: Was she cute?
Me: Yeah, I guess she was alright.
Chase: I always feel like I should tip cute girls who serve me but that’s weird to do at a fast food drive thru, right?
Me: Well, yeah. More importantly, it’s totally inappropriate to do when your girlfriend is present.
Me: Uh, yeah!
Chase: But, baby! When I check out girls, I’m doing it as us. I’m not thinking ‘I should fuck that girl.’ I’m thinking ‘We should fuck that girl.’
Me: Oh, yeah. I’m sure.